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by Guest Columnist Tonya Vrba, of The Dating Site.
There is no crime in wanting the stereotypical American dream of a family home in the suburbs with plenty of room for your 2-3 kids to run around in the back yard. Such a dream is certainly possible, but it takes a lot of work. Try following these timeless tips…
1. Be patient. Unless you had a spectacular scholarship and were luckier when looking for a job after college, you are not going to be living the high life straight out of college. Your high school or college sweetheart may be near and dear to your heart, but you have a lot of growing up to do before vows are made. Make sure you know who you are as an individual first. What are your interests and goals in life? Think carefully. Changing your partner consumes much time and money – not to mention emotional pain. High school and college relationships do workout often enough, but be careful not to stay with someone just because you’re afraid to start over.
2. Be Strong when Dealing with Heartache. We all know at least one person who broke up with someone they planned on spending the rest of their life with. Some people jump back quickly and others wallow in pain for months or years, wishing for what might have been. Don’t be that person. When you go for your American dream, you can’t let this stand in your way. You weren’t lying when you told your ex that you would love them forever – you will. Understand that this is okay. When you meet someone new who you fall in love with, don’t think about trying to love them more or less and don’t think of them as a replacement. The love is completely different and as unique as the new person you are dating. Once things get serious with someone new, be open about your past hurt. A mature and deserving partner will understand your pain.
3. Stabilize your Life. No One achieves the American dream without some planning and strategy. When job prospects and finances are shaky, it is not the best time to start a family. Create a budget and learn how to adequately save your money. Estimate how much it will cost to raise a child. That little one will be financially dependent on you for at least 18 years. Adding more children to the mix only multiplies the cost. Couples often fight over finances, so make sure you and your partner are on the same page. After all, if you don’t already share finances, you will when a child comes along. Plan a family budget, even if it’s just the two of you.
4. Discuss the Unthinkable Before it Happens. What If one of you has a horrible accident that piles on medical bills or leaves a disability that will add cost to daily living expenses. What if one of you loses your lovely stable job? Even those who have achieved the American dream don’t always have an easy time of it. Your ability to weather the tough times will make the difference between success and failure in your relationship.
5. Don’t Compare Yourself to Others. Your American Dream is your own. You may want an average house and an average number of kids, but they will also be unique to you. Your children will have their own personalities that help define the family. You may not have a pool in your back yard like the Jones.’ And your son may have more fun programming computers than playing sports. But you save money because you don’t have to pay high water bills or pay someone to clean your pool, plus your son is earning a full scholarship to college! Always look on the bright side and soon you will realize your American dream has come true.
6. Never Give Up. Every Day is a gift. If you haven’t met that special someone, then today might be the day. If not, at least you can prepare yourself for when he or she finally appears. Stay happy, healthy and optimistic to the best of your ability. If you have already found the one, make sure they know every day that they are the reason your dreams came true. Doing so will help you count your blessings daily and ensure that the dream continues, forever.
About the Author:
More tips, mainly for men, are covered in the eBook Magic Bullets, often regarded as the bible of male attraction. You can find more info by clicking the preceding link.
Tags: being successful, achieving your dreams, saving money, relationship advice, success
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